“Fear is an emotion associated with anticipated pain. Former Art Of Charm coach Sameem Rouhani calls it “the discomfort of uncertainty.” It’s useful because we survived as a species by avoiding pain. But social fear in all its forms typically boils down to avoiding a particular type of pain—rejection. As early humans learned, being part of the group was advantageous for survival; being abandoned or rejected by the group meant hardship or death.
The reason the Harbingers’ work with social anxiety in dating maps well to business is because business is inherently social: You’re making things for people, selling things to people, and working with people to make all that happen. And rejection—whether from customers, supporters, partners, investors, colleagues, bosses, “the market,” you name it—almost always feels personal.”
Ways you can battle that fear
- Collect Data (of successes)
- Use the principle of progresssive overload (pushing yourself a little farther) in a safe environment
- Flip your internal script (Change a negative outlook to a positive one)
That’s what progressive overload is all about. “There’s always going to be a fear of failure in business,” AJ says. “You need to be comfortable being uncomfortable.”